LPT

[Dreamer]

Quick life pro tip:

Don't want you co-workers to see you eating an entire 18 inch sub for lunch?

Ask the restaurant to cut it into thirds and wrap them all separately.

Eat a third. And then when no one is looking, unwrap the next section.

If you do it right it looks like you're eating only one tiny 6 inch sub really slowly and responsibly!

Bonus?

The guy who took your order will think you're ordering for 3 normal sized people, and not just your single fat ass!

Now take that advice and go. No thanks necessary.

[Mav]

Pro-tip:

Order the 18 inch sub for lunch.

When your coworker looks at you funny, shout "I DO WHAT I WANT" and slap them across the face with your huge, phallic sandwich.

Bonus?

Your coworkers will begin submitting to your orders out of fear and conditioning, you're now management material!

[Dreamer]

Not to sound like too much of a Hufflepuff...

But I feel like the fillings would fall out...

[Rorschach]

Mav's filling always comes out when he's slapping his co-workers across the face with his hugs phallic 'sandwich'.
This is a good tip although it does make me wonder how many people in your office are doing the same thing. We should all come out. Lunch-wise.

[Dreamer]

Ugh... Fine...

My name is Neil.

I ate an 18 inch Philly style sub from "Firehouse" yesterday.

And I had them cut it into thirds (and wrap them separately) for one reason:

So I didn't have to look an 18 inch sub in they eye on my my desk.

And, I won't lie... I briefly considered asking for no onions on one of those thirds. Just to perpetuate the lie.

AND I LOVE ONIONS!!!!!

Are you happy Rors????

I LOVE ONIONS!!!

*weeps*

...are you happy???

[Deacon]

Jesus you eat 18" worth of onion-covered sub for lunch on a work day in the office? I bet your coworkers love you.

[Dreamer]

Not as a rule, no.

I like to say I'm cutting carbs.

Into thirds.

to avoid suspicion.

See what I did there?

I've still got it...

[FirebirdNC]

Pro-tip:

Order the 18 inch sub for lunch.

When your coworker looks at you funny, shout "I DO WHAT I WANT" and slap them across the face with your huge, phallic sandwich.

Bonus?

Your coworkers will begin submitting to your orders out of fear and conditioning, you're now management material!

I'm going to second this, if this fails you can also dry mount them.

[Rorschach]

And that was the day I lost my job at the women's refuge.

[Dreamer]

I see what you did there.
*rimshot*

[gravity]

Goddamitalltohell, now I want a sandwich.

[Rorschach]

Goddamitalltohell, now I want a sandwich.

Well, you know where the kitchen is, don't you? And while you're at it, make me one. [/HTRN]

In tribute to Dreamer, I bought a Subway for lunch this morning. In testament to the fact that I'm a little woofter, it was only a 6" though.

[raptor9k]

I miss HTRN's contributions to the gun thread...

[Rorschach]

And we never got to know what the 'H' stood for. I'm going to guess 'Hank'.

[Rorschach]

Or he's a hologram.