My fat cock

[Rorschach]

Which is a Scottish word for 'lewt'.

Teaching foreigners is such a rewarding experience. One is blessed with a rich diversity of cultures, beliefs and world-views.
Also, presents.

Today is the last day of term before the Christmas holdays. So far, I have accumulated:

A bottle of Martell.
A nice chardonnay.
A tupperware box full of, what looks like, chicken biryani.
A selection box.
A box of praline melts.
Two stackable snowmen mugs.
A glass fountain-pen holder. For when it's the 1800s again.

And it's only noon.
Rest assured, disinterested nerds, I shall be updating hourly.

[Hirschof]

I am extremely disappointed by this thread.

(Nice haul so far, Rors)

[Deacon]

I've received no presents from my coworkers (aka minions). I'll take all the alcohol they'll give me, though.

[Rorschach]

I can now add to this:

A giant polar bear mug.
A bottle of 'Ferrari' aftershave.
A tray of prawn dumplings which just promise toiletal unrest in the future.

Deacon, do you have scurrying bitches desperately vying for your love and approval? At work, I mean.

[Deacon]

Not really, no. What a shame, eh? This place is a sausage fest anyway. However, we did our White Elephant gift exchange today with some funny and some legitimately desirable items coming up, including a bottle of Patron Silver, a bottle of Tito's Vodka, and a bottle of some sort of fancy gin.

I do have one of these, though:

[Lizzegirle]

We had our office Christmas party today and here's my load:

1 jacket. I might exchange it.
1 Starbucks gift card.
1 leather purse.
1 Donna Karen perfume & lotion set.

[thejerseyminx]

My company Christmas party was last weekend and we did a white elephant exchange. A big ol' Starbucks mug. I luff it.

Otherwise, I got a brand new pillow top bed from my grandfather and his wife. I'm not expecting much more this year!

[Rorschach]

White elephant?
I'm guessing either a lucky dip or Secret Santa?
You wacky Americans with your moon-pie this and your color that and your ew no get away from me other.

There is one more class to go this morning. It's a computing class which, obviously, I'm not teaching.
But I'm going to go and hang around anyway until people give me more things.

Oh, and I tried the Ferrari aftershave last night. Boy, if I'd thought Nicola was repelled by me before...

[Rorschach]

And this year brings:

A bottle of port.
A nice Chianti.
A cava set with chocolates.
One large box of Ferrero Rocher (Oh, ambassador!)
A bottle of aftershave 'Lansy Silver' made in the United Arab Emirates which, stranegly only has three ingredients: 'alcohol denat, water fragrance and benzopherone-2'. Sounds like I might be better drinking it.
A bottle of similar for Nicola named 'Lamya'. It's 'Concentrated on Perfume.' Apparantly.

[edit]Bix box of McVities chocolate biscuits.
Box of Marks and Spencer's biscuits
Box of assorted baklava

Yeah, I know this shit fascinates you.

I have another few classes to collect from, mind you. These people know how to progress through the levels.

[Hirschof]

Yeah? Well, I'm up to one candy cane. So, there.

[Rorschach]

Yeah, but there's a reason why you look as if you were hewn from rock while I look like an uncooked pie.

[Hirschof]

Probably for the best. I have a tendency to kill holiday food and drink.

Its been a slim year for both family and friends. This year is more about the get-togethers rather than gifts.

[Rorschach]

And this year brings:

A bottle of port.
A nice Chianti.
A cava set with chocolates.
One large box of Ferrero Rocher (Oh, ambassador!)
A bottle of aftershave 'Lansy Silver' made in the United Arab Emirates which, stranegly only has three ingredients: 'alcohol denat, water fragrance and benzopherone-2'. Sounds like I might be better drinking it.
A bottle of similar for Nicola named 'Lamya'. It's 'Concentrated on Perfume.' Apparantly.

[edit]Bix box of McVities chocolate biscuits.
Box of Marks and Spencer's biscuits
Box of assorted baklava
[edit2]Bottle of Glenfiddich
Bottle of Cotes du Rhone
Still all from the same class.

Yeah, I know this shit fascinates you.

I have another few classes to collect from, mind you. These people know how to progress through the levels.

[ampersand]

Let me know if you need fava beans to go with your Chianti, Rosch.

[Deacon]

If you're looking for brains, though, best move on to a more "target-rich environment."