Best man gags

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Rorschach
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Re: Best man gags

Post by Rorschach » Wed Jul 15, 2015 2:24 pm

Postponed! The bride's father passed away!

Come to think, that should be in rants and raves.
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Arres
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Re: Best man gags

Post by Arres » Wed Jul 15, 2015 8:01 pm

Yeah, we do it differently. Generally, if the Best Man is still sober enough to stand, he gives a speech. Usually, it's a poorly considered dirty story that the Groom will find embarrassing, and his family doesn't want to here. He follows that up with a half hearted "CONGRATS YOU TWO!" and everyone is glad that's over. Then OTHER people get to stand up and do something similar until everyone who needs to say their congratulations and have it witnessed by EVERYONE THERE is finally done and we can stop pretending we're listening.
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Sir Spankspeople
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Re: Best man gags

Post by Sir Spankspeople » Sat Jul 18, 2015 12:28 am

Honest to god, I read the title of this thread as "best man eggs" and thought it might be about swapping manly breakfast recipes.

Imagine my disappointment...
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Rorschach
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Re: Best man gags

Post by Rorschach » Sat Jul 18, 2015 7:52 am

I had originally intended it as a treatise decrying the oppressive matriarchy that denies men the freedom to ovulate and bear children, but it would just have led to too many arguments. :(
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FirebirdNC
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Re: Best man gags

Post by FirebirdNC » Sat Jul 18, 2015 10:17 am

Rorschach wrote:I had originally intended it as a treatise decrying the oppressive matriarchy that denies men the freedom to ovulate and bear children, but it would just have led to too many arguments. :(
No oppression here I would totally let you have my babies, hell all three are currently in college you can have them right now.
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Rorschach
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Re: Best man gags

Post by Rorschach » Sat Jul 18, 2015 4:09 pm

My respect for you as a poster and fondness for you as a person preclude me from responding to that in my usual manner.

College, eh? And at what age can you ship them off to that? Do I really need to wait another ten years?
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Deacon
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Re: Best man gags

Post by Deacon » Sun Jul 19, 2015 12:40 am

Generally 18. Maybe less if they're exceptionally smart or more if they're exceptionally not ;)
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Rorschach
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Re: Best man gags

Post by Rorschach » Sun Jul 19, 2015 9:16 am

I'll leave it to her to decide how hard to study. I've been lovingly whispering "When you're sixteen, you're out the door" into her sleeping ear since her first day in the maternity ward.
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JermCool
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Re: Best man gags

Post by JermCool » Mon Jul 20, 2015 7:35 am

You glared at her during breastfeeding times, didn't you?
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Rorschach
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Re: Best man gags

Post by Rorschach » Mon Jul 20, 2015 9:50 am

:lol:
My reasoned argument of 'But you've got another one there doing nothing" fell on stubborn ears. :(
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